As sad as it is to accept, not all marriages continue to be happy and healthy. Sometimes, the best decision is to end the marriage even if you both still love each other. If love is not enough to make things work, and you know you will work better as friends or co-parents to your children without necessarily being married, it’s time to let go.
But first, you can tell everyone you love about the decision to get divorced.
Throw a Party
It might not be the most common advice you’ll receive after you’ve had a divorce in Denver, Colorado, but an uncoupling party can be the best way to tell family and friends that there are no hard feelings between you and your former spouse. It can be everything a wedding is expected to be–but reversed. For example, you can share your vows, but they won’t be talking about your life together. They will include your best wishes to each other. It’s the sincerest goodbye you can say to someone who has been your partner for a while. If you’re comfortable ending the uncoupling ceremony with a kiss, do it as one final goodbye; if not, everyone will understand why you skipped this part of the ceremony.
Have a Family Trip
When you discuss divorce with your children together, there will be questions. Your children might not fully grasp the idea of divorce, which means they might either underthink or overthink it. To set their expectations and to assure them that your feelings towards them will not be affected, plan a trip where the whole family can bond. This tells the children that you will not stop being their parent. You and your spouse might not live in the same house anymore, but when the children need you both, you will be there without question. This, of course, requires that you follow through. Avoid making promises to your children if you can’t keep them, as this might ruin the trust they give you.
Talk to Your Support System
You’re allowed to give yourself time to heal and be on your own for as long as you need. However, this doesn’t mean you don’t need support. If you have a huge circle of friends, telling one person might mean the news is out to everyone. This saves you the trouble of having to tell them separately, but this also means you have that support group that you’re not utilizing to help you deal with the change. Even if the divorce is done amicably, you will still be emotional and will feel that loss of your life partner. Even if your friends already know, give yourself time to talk to them. Their mere company and assurances will help you deal with the pain. Knowing you’re not alone in this will give you the strength to move forward.
A divorce might be hard to explain when you and your spouse are still on good terms. Despite the amicable parting, you still need to heal, so give yourself time.